OK.... SERIOUSLY WHATZ YOUR ODDS....

 

     So in reality based on the amount of building tours I do getting a studio into this building is a bit of a miracle. Most times it is the freaky hand of fate that deals you the winning blow and you get signed up for a one year sentence. (with your only chance of parole being bad behavior).

     Here is the thing... you have to try... unless of course you are spineless and believe what everyone tells you. Like I said it is the freaky hand of fate that will get you in here quicker than your good looks or fast talking "self presentation". Of course don't go thinking that just because you have a good paying job, perfect credit score, tons of references, are quiet and respectful of neighbors that this ruins your chances! No even you could still get a studio here... but of course like everyone else you do have to apply first. In order to apply you have to stop by for a tour. Now remember you can stop by for a tour even if you are not sure it is what you are looking for.


First ... How To Cope If You Don't...

     The main thing to remember is this. If you get chosen for a studio here it was because of your amazing talent and impeccable demeanor and character. If you don't it was because I sold out to some other cheezy artist's schlep and likely bribes. If this happens then you need to add this to your "I'll show them" file that every successful person needs in order to do great things in life.  Though most hugely successful people won't admit it, their "I'll show them" file was the thing that made them what they are today. It gave them the drive and determination to get going when the going got tough. It is better than a get out of jail free card.

     Remember enemies give us motivation.... and "motivation" will always triumph over the cheese ball "encouragement" that your shallow friends give you!!! Do you owe me or Reliance for not getting you in the building?.... nah.... just remember to pay it forward and your good karma will take care of the rest!!! Remember if you are not making your life fun you are missing the point. If your "fun" depends on "your" wants and desires unfolding how "you" see fit well.... good luck on that one. 


How To Cope If You Do Get A Studio...

     The main thing is to stay calm when I call. The second I tell you the studio is yours start excitedly screaming at the top of your lungs like an idiot. This will tell me you are crazy and that I probably made the right choice. Remember from that point on your days before moving in are going to drag on like never before. Be prepared. Hell some people even start thinking they got lucky! Either way this is going to shift your life... hopefully... to the better. And if you really are lucky even as better as those that don't get in here!!!



Seriously... what Is The ARC Really Going To Do For You?

     Well in all honesty... nothing. Not one dam thing! No, just like life, only you can do things for you. What you decide to do during your sentence here is up to you and only you. Knowing this makes the ARC an even funner place. Simply because the ARC is just like a lump of clay sitting on the table. You can look at it all you want or talk about it all you want but it aint doing nothing. Not until you start doing something with it. Then it could turn into magic... or not.

     So if you do get in here and want to be happy that is up to you. The truth is the ARC itself will likely be annoying more than anything else. The noise, the rent increases, the leaky tap seals, the manager who won't shut up, the cheezy Live ARC News emails, your noisy neighbors etc...

     Now if a year later you feel like nothing is changing and life is a struggle here... no worries! Just mark it down as another one of your dumb ideas that struck out. Pack up what you learned and move on. Personally I collect dumb ideas I have struck out on. Which reminds me I need grab another terabyte!


For The Easily Offended...

     Now just so you know when it come to picking tenants my own mother could not get in here any sooner than the next person. So if you don't get chosen don't take it personal. There are two reasons. It either wasn't meant to be... or wasn't meant to be yet... There is no need to sales pitch me on yourself mostly because I do too many tours to remember everyone. Hell I have trouble remembering the names of those nicepeople with the house and free food I grew up with. The best thing you can do is make sure I have some stuff to work with on your email application. Pics of you, your work, links to websites etc. As far as my part goes I need to see some serendipitous alignment, a passion for your work or goals on your part, to get some hunches, to talk to my friends on the mother ship, get a tarot reading, toss some coins and then eat ice cream until it hits me. This is how we keep the weirdos out. 


HERE'S AN EXAMPLE OF HOW IT GOES...

     I had one guy once wanting a studio for him and his girlfriend. Turns out he drew the short straw.... Even though I had a serious hunch he needed to be in here. On the phone he started throwing a bit of a hissy fit. I yelled at him to SHUT UP... mostly just to jar him out of his bum state. Then I told him I had a hunch and to keep in touch. Two days later I had a last minute dasher.... phoned him... hundred dollars more... hugely bigger. They were so thankful they never got the first one they were crying about it was unreal. They absolutely loved it here! In my books he is one cool dude and has top priority if he ever wanted back. You gotta trust.

      Of course no one can linger around for ever sleeping in their car. If it doesn't work out then maybe it will further down the road. Turn over here used to be stable before that bad flue struck the country these last two years. Now it is all over the board. I will get nothing for five months and then have five come up. So basically you do the tour, get in your application and hope for the best.

..... might be continued....